Here’s something I hear a lot in sessions with athletes:

“I can’t stop thinking about that mistake I made.”

But what if it wasn’t a mistake?

The Mirror Play

He was a college soccer player.

Sharp, disciplined, all-in.

We were breaking down a match that had been haunting him — one goal in particular.

“I don’t know what I was doing,” he said. “I gave him too much space. I should’ve closed earlier. It was a stupid mistake.”

I let the words sit. Then I asked:

“What if he just made a better play?”

Silence.

The kind of silence that happens when something shifts.

Great Play = Skill. Bad Play = Mistake?

In sports like hockey, soccer, basketball, and football territory sports with constant momentum swings we’ve built this mental double standard:

  • When we win a play: “That was a great move. I beat him clean.”
  • When we lose a play: “I messed up. I should’ve done better.”

But often? It’s the same play just reversed.

You create separation, make the cut, bury the shot. That’s skill.

Then later, someone does the same to you and suddenly, it’s your mistake?

This is what I call The Mirror Play.

The Mirror Play is what happens when someone does to you what you’ve done to others. They beat you with a great move, not because you failed, but because they earned it.

It’s not about blame. It’s about perspective.

Every play has a reflection. And if we learn to recognize that, we don’t crumble, we adjust.

Because in high-level sport, the goal isn’t perfection.

It’s resilience. It’s recognizing the rhythm of the game and staying in it.

Why This Reframe Changes the Game

When you frame every lost possession as a mistake, you:

  • Tighten up
  • Get reactive
  • Let shame creep in
  • Play not to lose instead of to win

But when you view it as a great play by the opponent, you:

  • Stay present
  • Stay grounded
  • Focus on your next decision
  • Keep your learning brain on

The outcome doesn’t change. You still got beat.

But the story you tell yourself? That’s everything.

Let It Land

“Was that a mistake… or was it just a mirror play?”

This isn’t letting yourself off the hook. Of course there are times when you do make a mistake. In these instances we want to own these mistakes, accept them, and learn from them.

It’s about staying in the game mentally.

So next time you get beat, don’t spiral. Don’t self-destruct.

Recognize it. Adjust. Stay aggressive.

You’re not broken. You’re in the game.

This blog was written by Coach Brant.